Suzie Boreton is a character in Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency.
At age nine, Suzie won the Ohio Junior Membermazing Competition by having memorized the whole first act of the Shakespeare play Macbeth.
In high school, Suzie was popular, with many friends, including Carol, Jeanette, Karen, and Lisa. She also was prom queen. She had sex with Karen's boyfriend. She smoked cigarettes in secret behind the gym, which Lisa told on; in retaliation Suzie told people that Lisa screwed Mr. Hauser.
Four years before season 2, she was in a car accident while she was driving carpool on Xanax, including her (former) friend Carol's child. Suzie suffered a hip injury that made it difficult to walk, and she used a cane henceforth. Suzie didn't apologize for the accident and became somewhat reclusive, avoiding people for the next four years.
A magical changeEdit
Suzie woke up to her son Scott setting off fireworks in their car outside the house. The following altercation resulting in Suzie confiscating Scott's phone, and Scott locking her out of the house, necessitating Suzie climbing to her bedroom window with a ladder. Suzie drove to work, dropping off Bob on the way at his place of work, the Cardenas' Family Motor Inn. At the motel she saw Todd Brotzman, and on the next leg of the drive she saw Bart Curlish cycle by in the opposite direction.
At work, her boss Dan Samuels reminded her to get some paperwork done. Her office was visited by the Mage who talked with her, then spoke to Samuels, and killed him. The Mage told her he would send someone to get the body and left; Suzie did not call the police. 
At night when she was washing off the blood, four Cavatos Thugs came to the office and dragged her outside; they also bagged Samuels' body and put it in a car boot. The Cavatos Leader then tried to kill her with a magic wand and book supplied to them by the the Mage for that purpose. When he couldn't get that to work and tried to kill her directly, Bart Curlish appeared and killed all four men. Bart spared Suzie's life, contrary to her feelings. When Bart once again got threatening, Suzie started screaming, the magic wand flew into her hand, and she used it to send Bart flying by screaming a magic word (Borobotos) through the wand. Afterwards she gathered the wand and book, and fled the scene, returning home unnoticed by her family and locking herself in the bathroom.
Joining the MageEdit
On the fifth day, Sheriff Sherlock Hobbs and Deputy Farah Black came to the Boreton house to question Suzie. Suzie received them in her old appearance and faking her limp. To deflect suspicion she spun a lie about her son Scott having killed the dog Agrajag with his car, possibly intentional, and that he was talking about fantastical and disturbing things and she feared Scott might do something bad. She told them Scott wasn't answering his phone, but if they wanted to find him he was going to be at Sound of Nothing concert with DJ Applesauce that night. She heard Farah mention that they would go there to look for Scott with "Dirk".
Suzie intended to go to the concert to find and kill Dirk Gently, about which the Mage talked to her again. Suzie dressed up in party clothes and went to the concert that night. She found Dirk but couldn't get through the crowd so she cast a calming spell on it, just after DJ Applesauce came on stage. She dropped her magic wand and went crawling after it trying to retrieve it.
Suzie eventually found her wand. She sat in the deserted Sound of Nothing concert barn when she was found by her son Scott, who gave her a heartfelt speech. Suzie's only response was to turn him into a toad.
Suzie then went to the Mage who sat in the Cardenas house's mural room, apologizing for her failure and promising to do better. Finding that the Mage was having an existential crisis and had no interest in further pursuing their goal, Suzie refused to be deterred and told him she would finish the job.
Later she was at her house when Deputy Tina Tevetino from the Bergsberg County Sheriff's Department phoned her, saying they had detained Scott. Suzie called them on their lie and threatened them.
Suzie then went to the Hill County Memorial Hospital to kill Dirk and the Boy. Making her way through it and using the Toros spell, she killed various bystanders (among them the Hospital Receptionist and Officer Rizzio) while pursuing Dirk's team who were fleeding with Arnold Cardenas. Farah managed to shoot her in the head, but Suzie used magic to remove the bullet and continue her pursuit, until she finally killed Arnold. Just seconds after, Mr. Priest entered the hallway, and then shot her multiple times until she fell through a closed window at least three floors to the ground. By the time Priest looked out, she had disappeared.
Disheveled, dirty, bloody, and with glass shards in her face, Suzie returned to the Boreton house, where she told the Mage that she had defeated Dirk Gently and killed the Boy, and told him to send her to Wendimoor.
Suzie traveled to Wendimoor, still with her disheveled appearance. She came into the village of Wakti Wapnasi and the Bofuki Nepoo, intent on removing Wakti which the magic book mentioned as the only other magic user in Wendimoor. Suzie killed Wakti and several Bofuki Nepoo with a Toros spell before moving on. Later she came onto Lord Triangle Badevil and a group of Kellum Knights on the Bridge, introducing herself as the successor of the Mage and their new ruler. Once they saw her wielding the apprentice's wand, they submitted to her rule. Suzie then used a spell on herself, healing and transforming her disheveled self into a dark queenly appearance.
Behind the scenesEdit
- Suzie Boreton is portrayed by actress Amanda Walsh.
- Suzie wears shirts with plot-appriate text on them: "Don't Make Me Use My SUPERPOWERS!" in Space Rabbit, "I Can't Believe It!" in Fans of Wet Circles, "If your eyes hurt it's because you are looking at a star!" in The House Within the House, "GIRL POWER" in Girl Power.
- She wears a Lux Dujour shirt to Sound of Nothing.
- Season 2 (BBC America)
- Oddly enough, Suzie seems to be a dark counterpart to Todd when he was introduced in season 1:
- They both were people who, prior to the beginning of the series, had done rather bad things in their life until something caused them to turn around, Amanda getting Pararibulitis for Todd and the car accident for Suzie.
- Both, during their first appearances, were leading dull, boring, dead-end lives in jobs they disliked until a strange being entered their lives and changed those lives forever (Dirk for Todd and the Mage for Suzie), not to mention both men asking them "Have you noticed an acceleration of strangeness in your life?"
- Both became a partner for said being: Todd became an "assistant" to Dirk while Suzie became an "apprentice" to the Mage.
- However, the real difference between Todd and Suzie is, as time went on, both changed in different ways: Todd became a better and more optimistic person who's life has changed for the better as he solved the Spring Case with Dirk while Suzie on the other hand has become corrupted by the power that the wand, and by a certain extent, the Mage, has given her (before, she was hesitant about killing people, but by the time she went after Arnold Cardenas, not to mention killing anyone in her path, and getting shot at by Mr. Priest, plus falling out a high story window), she's now insane, psychopathic, and as Priest put it, "a little bit...nuts"